Today is rung 1 of 3 on this topic
Doing homework without a hostage negotiation
Can do: Starts homework at an agreed time, works for a set stretch, and asks for help specifically.
Why it matters
The habit matters more than the homework does. A child who can start without a fight has a skill worth more than the worksheet.
What it looks like when it's wobbly
An hour of avoidance before ten minutes of work, and "I don't get it" as a whole-task refusal.
⏱️ Two-minute check
Watch one homework session without intervening. Time the start delay.
Solid looks like: Starts within five minutes and works for fifteen without supervision.
The full activity for this topic · 20 minutes
Same Time, Same Place, Timer On
- 1Fix the time and place. Decision fatigue is most of the fight.
- 2Set a timer for fifteen minutes. Work until it goes, then a real break.
- 3Teach the specific question: not "I don't get it" but "I don't know what this word means".
- 4They park stuck questions on a list and carry on, rather than stopping dead.
- 5Review the list together at the end — that's the ten minutes you actually spend helping.
If it's too hard
Ten-minute stretches with you in the room.
If it's too easy
They plan the week's homework across the days themselves on a Sunday.
Say this
"'I don't get it' isn't a question I can answer. What exactly is the bit that's stuck?"